


to be human (is to love)

by mysweetadeline



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Implied Relationships, Tony Stark Has A Heart, i love my baby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-02 04:55:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18804127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysweetadeline/pseuds/mysweetadeline
Summary: “I love you 3000,” Morgan says to him, all sweet and genuine and to Tony, this may as well be a love that is infinite, a never ending stream of affection that can fill him up in all the places he has been broken; make him whole again.Peace is really a terrible thing in that it is easily (always) lost.Tony is a terrible thing in that he always keeps searching for it.~or~Tony knows what he has to do, and he knows in his heart that it's right.





	to be human (is to love)

**Author's Note:**

> song: to be human by sia
> 
> hello there, i'm sad, plz enjoy.

Your father once told you that peace meant having the bigger stick than the other guy.

 

(Your father once died at the hands of a terrorist organization he helped create.)

 

 _Your father,_ you think, _couldn’t have been more wrong._

 

***

 

Peace is a funny thing in that it is always taken for granted, and only reveals itself once it’s gone.

 

Tony is a funny thing in that he knows exactly where it is, and how to find it.

 

(“Let’s build a home together,” Tony had said, still strapped to an IV when the news of their defeat broke. He hadn’t wasted a second. “Lakeside. By the woods. Plenty of O2 to go around.”

 

He had paused, his dark eyes flicking up to hers in hesitation. “Would that make you happy?”

 

“Yes,” Pepper was smiling wider than Tony had ever remembered, her eyes sparkling. “ _Yes_.”)

 

Their daughter has Howard’s eyes and Pepper’s smile and Tony hopes, _prays_ that she won’t grow up to have any of his own faults.

 

“I love you 3000,” Morgan says to him, all sweet and genuine and to Tony, this may as well be a love that is infinite, a never ending stream of affection that can fill him up in all the places he has been broken; make him whole again.

 

Peace is really a terrible thing in that it is easily (always) lost.

 

Tony is a terrible thing in that he always keeps searching for it.

  
***

 

_“The truth is, (cameras clicking, cameras flashing)_

_I am Iron Man.”_

 

_Maybe, you hadn’t realized the weight the words held, what it truly meant._

 

_(Maybe, it was inside you all along)._

 

***

 

He - Thanos - is winning. He’s stronger and faster than all of you combined, and maybe your father was right in all the ways you had hoped he was wrong.

 

But deep down, a sense of foreboding rises in your throat, seizing at your brain and dragging out the truth that Strange knew and you, yourself knew for quite some time now.

 

_(the end of the path I started us on)_

 

A part of you wants, selfishly, to go back to the years without disruption, all _lakeside and sparkling eyes and Morgan’s smile._

 

A part of you wishes, (even more selfishly), that you never let your guilt get to you in the first place, never tinkered with time travel, never rejoined the Avengers.

 

But the funny, _terrible_ thing about peace is that it is only ever achieved through sacrifice, and you’re staring peace straight in the eye and it _has to_ \- has to be you.

 

Because you could never just be Tony Stark, from the moment you announced your identity all those years ago to all the times you fought with it. Just like how Steve could have never stopped fighting for Bucky and how Natasha could have never stopped believing in Steve.

 

“I am inevitable.” Thanos grins. He is still so, so confident.

 

You feel this incredulous surge of power, of resilience, of _fear_. Tony is a billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. Tony is someone who loves his wife and daughter. Tony is a long time ago now and _you_ , you are an _Avenger_ , you are the goddamn hero, - and you open your heart out to the world and you -

 

are

 

_Iron Man._

 

***

 

“It’s okay,” is what Pepper says to you in your final moments, all hushed and soft tones, her eyes holding back a dam and the freckles on her nose crinkling in despair.

 

But the truth is that none of this is _okay_ , none of this smoke and ash and blood, none of the tears and distance between friends and _I understand now_ , you want to tell Steve and wish you could tell Natasha, _I understand._

 

There’s no more time left for any of that. There’s no more time left for you. Your eyes close, your breathing slows, and your - _your father -_

 

 _Your father,_ you think, _couldn’t have been more wrong._

 

It was never about having the bigger stick, only the better heart.

 


End file.
